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Ah, the Miracles of Science

May 26, 2004

Just read…words cannot describe this.

As part of an ambitious effort to identify genes that cause disease in dogs and humans, scientists at the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle analyzed DNA collected from 414 dogs representing 85 breeds, including some of the most popular.

Among other findings, the analysis determined that the Chihuahua is actually a type of large rodent, selectively bred for centuries to resemble a canine.

The study found that several diminutive breeds had been independently created around the world from a variety of other animals, including the Lhasa apso (Tibetan snow rabbit), Pekingese (Chinese water rat), Shih Tzu (stoat), and Yorkshire Terrier (pigeon).

Sort of gives the term “rat-dog” a whole new significance, doesn’t it?

But wait, it gets better!

The potential ramifications of these findings are significant as condominiums and rentals around the nation which prohibit exotic animals anxiously await news as to whether scientists will be officially reclassifying these breeds as other animals.

“Oh, heavens, if they make it official that Chihuahuas aren’t dogs, it would make my day,” said Miami condominium owner Frances LaCroix. “I would finally have grounds to make Elsie Tabernathy get rid of her wretched little yapping pack of – rodents, did you say they were? Oh, that would be marvelous.”

DNA Study Finds Chihuahuas Aren’t Dogs

5 Comments leave one →
  1. Matt permalink
    May 26, 2004 9:47 am

    Okay, before everyone goes and freaks out – this is a SATIRICAL article, all in good fun, and not at all serious.

  2. May 27, 2004 1:51 am

    I’m so disappointed that this story isn’t true.

  3. Mark permalink
    May 27, 2004 2:29 pm

    does it give yu permission to throw the dogs/ rats against the wall? i think it should. throwing chihuahua’s against walls should be an lympuic sport….highest marks go to the people who generate the highest pitch and highest decibal yelping.

  4. Mark permalink
    May 27, 2004 2:30 pm

    geez i can’t type. i should really proofread this stuff.

  5. Matt permalink
    May 27, 2004 3:31 pm


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